After a long week, Mom died Friday morning at 3:34. She was lying peacefully in her bed surrounded by her husband Don, her children David, Mary and Helen one of her grandchildren, Adrian, and her daughter-in-law Susan.They were holding one another and holding her when she took her last breath.
The family had been together most of the day and had gone home around 10 to get some rest. The hospice nurse woke Mary around 2am and told her to wake Dad and call the family. Mom decided to donate her body to UT Southwestern Medical School. A memorial service will be scheduled.
This is one of the saddest days of my life, I can say without hesitation. Polly was such an important part of my life. She both shared and shaped some of the way I viewed the world. I always deeply valued and enjoyed our relationship, both adversarial and deeply devoted to each other. I could count on her being straightforward, whether I agreed or not.
ReplyDeleteI just realized that Polly and I have an almost 30 year relationship, not as long as some, but a very long time, especially given that I'm no longer married to Mary! She was one of those personalities I thought, foolishly enough, would just be here forever. She was a force of nature, part of the fabric and texture of my life, even if I was no longer "married into the family". But, as you know, once married into the family, always married into the family, right?
In this moment, I can't imagine a world without her. This will be one of those deaths that really tests your view of life going forward, of who you are, of what choices you make. Her passing forces you to recognize those parts of yourself that you thought were Polly, but, pleasantly and funnily, they are you. Polly could no longer fold towels in thirds, but I, for one, have continued that tradition, and without embarrassment to admit it. I am a much better organized person thanks to her. While I don't have post-it's stuck everywhere, I do have virtual post-it's scattered in the Notes app on my laptop, desktop and smart phone. Guilty, as charged.
Thanks, Polly, for the person you are. I feel a bit less confident that I will leave the world as better a place as you did, but I have been very fortunate to have had you in my life, and in Britt's and Anna's, as well.